GROOMS DUTIES

What Are the Duties of the Father of the Groom?

 

      

The parents of the bride play a vital role in planning their daughter's wedding, and traditionally, the father of the groom has had little to do. Times have changed and the father of the groom is becoming a bigger part of the planning and execution of his son's wedding. Some couples choose to include the groom's father in everything from planning the location of the ceremony to checking on the guests' welfare at the wedding reception.

1. Offer Assistance

   • Offer to help with planning, whether it's site planning or travel arrangements for out of town guests. Don't be afraid that you're stepping on toes. It is quite likely that your assistance will be appreciated.

   Host Rehearsal Dinner

   • The parents of the groom host the rehearsal dinner, which is usually held the night before the wedding. The rehearsal dinner may easily be the most fun, most relaxed part of the wedding. The father of the groom can help make it a positive experience for everyone involved.

   Toast

   • The host of the rehearsal dinner, traditionally the groom's father, will make the first toast to the happy couple. If you're nervous about speaking in public it's fine to plan ahead. You can't go wrong if you speak from your heart as it will mean a great deal to your son and his fiance.

   Receiving Line

   • If there is a receiving line during the reception you will need to be part of it. Greet guests with a smile and thank them for attending the wedding.

   Alcohol Watch

   • While it's not the most glamorous of duties, the father of the groom insures that guests of the rehearsal dinner and wedding reception drink responsibly. Don't be afraid to close down the bar if too many guests have had enough.

   Moral Support

   • From talking with your son about his plans to propose to helping him work through his pre-wedding jitters, a father's role is to encourage his son throughout the engagement and marriage process. Your son will have lifelong memories of your support.

   Welcome

   • Make it a point to welcome your new daughter-in-law and her family into your family. This kindness will help set the tone for a pleasant relationship

Some tips on how to make a wedding speech...

TWELVE TIPS TO HELP YOU WITH YOUR WEDDINGSPEECH

If the thought of having to make a wedding speech leaves you feeling weak at the knees, then perhaps these brief ideas will help you perform successfully.

1.      First, ask about the venue – indoors or out?  Is there a lectern, mike or anything else that may assist you?  Then, consider how long you wish to speak – not too long or short – three to seven minutes and remember it is about the couple; not you and that some attendees may talk through your speech – stay cool!

2.      Consider your audience – probably all ages and backgrounds – be inclusive and don’t be so smart as to offend anyone.  The Bride and Groom want to remember the special day and so don’t embarrass them too much.  Done with love, kindness and respect with a little humour, it will be remembered as another highlight.

3.      The first thing to do is to reflect on the reaction you wish to get to your speech after you have sat down.  Be inspired that your small contribution will be memorable for all the right reasons.

4.      So in writing your words, do some research; ask their friends to tell you of their poignant and funny personal experiences with them and include your own memories.  There would be many incidents worth sharing that won’t make them blush!  Parents and relations are often good for stories of when they were young.  Remember to do it with empathy and only use the best ones.

5.      Gather all your information and then write it out just as you feel it works in the raw form.   Then read it again and look at other descriptions and words.  Consider if your message will be interesting and will have impact – a worthwhile contribution to the wedding.

6.      Then, find an arresting opening; something to catch the attention.  Your conclusion should also have impact and connect with the opening.  Ensure that glasses are charged if you are proposing the toast.  In due course say… “Would you please rise for the toast to the bride and groom – the bride and groom.

7.      The language should be what you would use in everyday conversation, but reach out to your audience.  They are probably relaxed having enjoyed a few drinks – in party mode.

8.      Attempt to paint word pictures and if you able to prepare your speech early, you will be able to modify it and use phrases and language that lift your speech.  You may be able to add to comments made earlier by others.

9.      Your speech needs to use a logical progression of thoughts, but you don’t need to work through a chronological time-line and in fact, moving backwards and forwards and around may work better.  Experiment with various ideas for the ‘wow factor’.

10.   In developing your speech, you may want to gather feedback from someone you know who is a good speaker and experienced.  Practise your delivery (perhaps to the family pet) and speak slowly.  Repetition can be works powerful.

11.   Don’t be afraid to make changes to your speech as the confidence in your message grows.  The use of timbre in your voice is important, as is eye contact and strategic pauses can be helpful, but don’t overdo them.

12.   Your audience will be with you all the way.  They will understand your challenge and will love your effort.  Finally, enjoy yourself.  You have been provided with a great opportunity, a wonderful honour and you will do better than you think.  Afterwards, you will feel delighted with the positive feedback. 

Adelaide Public Speaking will help make your speak exciting and stress free...speak to our good friend Peter Martindale...

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Father of the Bride

Father of the Bride Duties

The most important role played by the father of the bride is that of supporting his daughter - emotionally and financially, as you always have.

Whilst the bride and mother of the bride will probably arrange the majority of the wedding, there will always be something you can help with. Find out from the start if they need help with anything specific, and then continue to offer your help throughout the following months. Perhaps you can help with writing the invitations, making favours or table plans or just helping with the fetching and carrying.

Agreeing the budget

The mother and father of the bride traditionally paid for the entire wedding. Given that the average cost of a wedding in the Australia is now more than $40,000, it is no longer expected that the father of the bride should foot the whole bill. The bride & groom often pay a lot more towards their big day and the groom's parents may also contribute.
Before they can start planning their wedding, the bride & groom need to know how much money they have to pay for the wedding. No one likes to bring up the subject of money, but your daughter will feel much less awkward if you bring up the subject first. Let them know how much you plan to contribute towards the cost of the wedding. The earlier they know, the earlier they can start planning - so try and discuss this as soon as you can after the engagement.
Whether you give them a lump sum towards the cost or pay for particular items is up to you. Whilst the latter is more traditional - it can cause more confusion, especially if your daughter has to keep asking you to write a cheque every five minutes. Unless you are organising specific aspects - it is often a lot easier to give them the money upfront.

Father of the bride speech

The father of the bride is the first person to make a speech, which can be nerve wracking even for the most confident people. Unlike the best man's speech, the father of the bride's speech is usually quite serious. There is of course nothing wrong with adding humour - a few light hearted comments in the right place may be required to stop you getting too emotional! The father of the bride speech is your opportunity to say a few choice words about your daughter.
Don't leave writing your speech until the last minute. Make a note of the following: memories of your daughter when she was younger, what makes her so special and finally your thoughts now as she begins her married life. Keep a notepad nearby and write down your thoughts as you think of them. For help on writing your speech, key things to include, tips and ideas - see wedding speeches.

Hosting the day

The father of the bride usually assumes the role of official host together with the hostess (mother of the bride) regardless of who actually pays for the wedding. Whilst this is the norm, it is not uncommon for both sets of parents to host the wedding. In fact, some weddings are hosted by the bride & groom themselves, especially if they have paid for the majority of the wedding.
The hostess is responsible for meeting and greeting the guests as they arrive, whilst the host should look out for all his guests - ensuring they have drinks. Whether you are the host or not, you should still try to meet all the guests and socialise throughout the day.

Wedding gifts

Traditional household appliances or furniture are popular wedding gifts from the parents of the bride & groom as a gift to help them set up home. However, as the cost of the average wedding increases - many parents are finding themselves paying out more than they would have done 10 years ago. It is now perfectly acceptable not to buy a wedding gift if you are contributing towards the cost of the wedding. If your contribution is to be their wedding gift, make that clear early on.

Wedding Check List

Planning a Wedding...so much to think of....

Planning a wedding can be an incredibly overwhelming task for someone who has never planned one before. So much planning and so many details are involved in a wedding that it is difficult to know where to start. Rather than diving into the whole affair without a plan, make time to put together a wedding checklist so you know what you have to do.

To begin, sit down with a pen and paper and make a list of everything you need to do. The first step to maintaining wedding planning sanity is to draw out the plans for everything you will need. This includes coordinating details ranging from the bride’s dress to bridesmaids gowns, tuxedos, location of both the wedding and reception, officials, decorations, reception food and entertainment and much more.

Step one on the wedding checklist should be to have a clear understanding of what your vision is for your special day. A good place to start is finalizing colours for both the wedding and the reception.

Once the overall vision for the affair is settled and a date is nailed down, it’s time to move on to step two on the wedding checklist: the venue. Before you can plan decorations or anything else involving the ceremony or reception, you have to know where both will be held. With the date, call around to some possible places, including country clubs, reception halls, parks and more. The possibilities are nearly endless depending on your vision for the day. Enlist the help of the bridesmaids in checking out a variety of reception venues. 

After a venue is chosen, plan the decour. If it’s just the venue for the ceremony, plan how you will decorate or plan seating options, the aisle itself, the altar and more. The decorations can be as extravagant as you – and again the budget – dictate, or simple. Flowers are a must, regardless of the size of the affair, and for this you will need to once again coordinate with a florist who can make that dream come true. 

 

The florist will come into play again in planning the reception’s decor. All receptions have flowers, whether they are just on the registration table or make up centrepieces on each and every table as well as decor around the room. Make sure the bride likes the arrangements, and that they are elegant and do not in any way prohibit guests from getting around the room and conversing easily.

The reception will also involve food, and you must coordinate with the venue, if it provides menu options, or a caterer. You may choose to simply have finger food and drinks while others wish for full meals. Make sure the invitations, which you must also keep tabs on, dictate which will be available. Entertainment at the reception is also a must, since this a celebration of the couple’s new life together. Choose either a DJ to spin records or a live band in whatever genre is appropriate.

 Overall, your job is made significantly easier by simply following the wedding checklist. It will enable you to fulfill all of your wants while at the same time ensuring you stick within your budget. This entire process can become overwhelming for anyone, and if this happens there is no shame in suggesting the bride employ a wedding planner. A wedding planner is experienced in providing perfect days for couples, and can pick up where you left off and finish the task with excellent results. After all, the best part of the day will be knowing that the bride and groom had the wedding of their dreams, regardless of who planned the affair.

Matron of Honour Duties

 

Planning a wedding can be extremely stressful, because it's the one day that you have been waiting for all your life and you want it to be perfect! However, you do not need to go through the load of wedding planning alone. Having an ally or confidant by your side, will help you go through these nerve-racking times. As the bride, you need to just look pretty and enjoy your wedding day. Delegate your responsibilities to the matron of honour, who can be a close friend or family member, and just relax. Handling the bridesmaids, telling them what to do, getting other wedding preparations underway, etc. are all part of the matron of honour's duties. A matron of honour is truly a person of honour, because she takes away the burden from the bride's shoulders.

Duties of the Matron of Honour 

The matron of honour is somebody who will not only help you with preparations for the wedding, but is somebody who will stand by you for every little, or major need on the wedding day. Let's have a look at the different matron of honour responsibilities before and on the wedding day.

Pre-Wedding Matron of Honour Duties
She helps the bride and groom with decisions regarding the wedding theme, wedding location, reception site and even looks into the stay arrangements for out-of-town guests.
She helps the bride find an appropriate wedding decorator, helps find a wedding cake baker and also assists in selecting the best designs for the reception site, cake, etc.
She helps the bride pick designs for the wedding invitations and get them printed. Moreover, helps the bride organize her guest list and address the invitations to all the guests.
She also helps the bride prepare the bride wedding day emergency kit and makes sure every essential item is placed in the kit.
She helps the bride with the wedding gown preparations. If the bride is getting a ready-made gown, then she helps the bride shop for it, else she goes with her to buy the gown material and also accompanies her to the designer. She also helps the bride with the purchase of other bridal accessories like shoes, tiara, jewellery, etc.
The matron of honour also helps the bride pick the bridesmaid's and flower girls' dresses. Moreover, she coordinates with the bridesmaids and informs them about the days for fitting, etc.
She helps the bride with the wedding favor arrangements and gives her valuable advice in this matter as well. She also helps pick gifts for the bridesmaids.
The matron of honour also helps the bride select wedding favors for the guests.
She also plans the bridal shower and bachelorette parties, with the help of the bridesmaids.
Organizes the wedding rehearsal and dinner rehearsal and ensures everybody involved attends it. She also handles all queries regarding the same.
She also makes appointments at a hair/beauty salon for the bridesmaids and ensures all of them get ready in time.
During the Wedding
The matron of honour makes sure the bride reaches the parlor, gets ready and reaches the church on time. She also ensures the bridesmaids are ready on time and are well aware of their respective duties.
The matron of honour should also shepherd the bridal party into the Church for the bridal march, at the appropriate time. She is to oversee the flower girls, page boys and bridesmaids. She should ensure the flower girls have their baskets, the page boy has the ring cushion, etc.
During the wedding ceremony, she holds the wedding bouquet of the bride.
The matron of honour can also be witness while signing the marriage certificate in Church. However, this is optional. You can ask anybody to be the witness.
After the wedding ceremony is over, the matron of honour gathers the bridal troop for photographs.
She also sees to the car arrangements for the bridal couple to drive in and reach the wedding reception site (of course, this is only if the wedding and reception site are different).
During the Reception
At the reception site, she oversees the different wedding arrangements and ensures everything is in order.
If the bride plans to change her attire before the wedding reception, then the matron of honour assists the bride in these arrangements as well. The matron of honour also gives the matron of honour speech.
During the wedding dance, the matron of honour dances with the best man.
She, along with the bridesmaids invite guests to sign the guest book.
The matron of honour also keeps an eye on the bride throughout the reception and ensures she gets a drink or a bite or two during the reception. She also helps her with some makeup touch ups.
The matron of honour also keeps track of the gifts received at the wedding reception and stores them properly, if nobody else is assigned for the task.
After the Wedding
She ensures all the gifts are carefully assembled and sent away to the required location by car, or any other means of transport.
Helps the bride change into her going-away outfit and stores the bridal gown and other accessories neatly and safely. She also makes sure the belongings are sent safely to the bride's house.
She also reminds the bride to give the bridesmaids, flower girls and page boy their gifts.
The bride will be on cloud nine, so it's the matron of honour's duty to thanks the bridesmaids and the other members of the bridal party for their good efforts.
There are no hard and fast rules pertaining to the matron of honour duties. The above list may seem intimidating to some, however, these were some general guidelines with respect to the role of a matron of honour. The bride may delegate some responsibilities to other people, considering all this is too much for a single person to handle. The matron of honour responsibilities will vary from one bride to another. Just remember to choose somebody reliable, responsible and trustworthy as your maid of honour. All the best!